Titik Perubahan

Hyep assalamualaikum !

Its been a while. Dah berhabuk gamaknya blog ni but even though dah lama tak tulis entry, big thanks to adik-adik batch 2018 matrikulasi yang search kat google dan etc pasal KMPP and been choosing my blog as their guidance.

To my readers out there yang once memang rajin baca plus ikut setiap entry Hana, I am really sorry for being away in such a long term.  Life gets tougher once you are getting older. I have been through a lot of things in my life and honestly it is very tiring.

 Of course, orang akan tanya.

'Hana, where have you been?'

Takk,,, tipuu.... Hahaha orang tanya dalam bahasa Melayu bukan English.

It's been 2 years since I really write something about my entire life. Last menulis pasal life rasanya waktu zaman matrik and then I stopped. Then, Hana sambung tulis entry dengan cerpen. It is because I am sad and I am not happy sebabtu tulis cerpen but it turn out that my cerpen ada fans. Thanks to kawan-kawan yang suka cerpen-cerpen tu.

..............................................

So? How am I right now?

Honestly, I have been through fasa menyedihkan dalam kehidupan. I can't tell more. It just somebody yang I love, really love, left me. He met my parent and my tok belah abah. Told me that he was going to marry me but the whole thing was a lie. Maybe he was just going to experience something new and he chose me to be the actor yang boleh melakonkan watak pengalaman baru. Well, it just something yang very shameful to share. Orang akan cakap, alahh biasalah cintan-cintun ni yang tak halal ni memang tak diredhai. Yes, I admit it. I was someone yang jaga ikhtilat before this and you know someone randomly geng surau approach me, of course la kita akan herghhh buat kesilapan dalam hidup. I have started to not put blame on people. I try to accept.

And now, I think I am going to start my new lovely life. Teringin nak jadi superb muslimah macam dulu. A very good one I think? But life taught me to be kind in other way. Like when my best friend crying, I am going to act like ' Oh no . Jangan nangis. ' and gelak. Buat lawak bagai. In the end tengah malam, I cry so hard. I even say to Allah untuk jangan bagi orang yang aku sayang sedih ya Allah, bagi aku sedih takpa . Aku dah biasa. 

You know what, once people yang kita sayang tinggalkan kita. Whatever it takes is kita nak happiness along them. Its okay bila orang tinggalkan kita, (orang maksudnya, family kita, kawan or etc), bila kita ditinggalkan, means they are happy now. Just pray the best for others. 

Banyak benda yang Hana lalui, bukan saja apa yang Hana sebut kat atas buatkan Hana kuat. The word 'Tak mengapa' tak semestinya kita meletakkan diri kita di bawah bila kita mengutamakan orang lain. It just, apa yang membuatkan kita bahagia? Mestilah dengan melihat kebahagiaan orang yang kita sayang. Instead of duduk bersedih, orang sekeliling kita takkan bahagia. Nak ibadah pun susah, nak study pun susah. Nanti Allah dan parent marah la kalau tak ibadah dan study. Kan?

Sooooo, TITIK PERUBAHAN. Dari satu titik, Hana akan mulakan corak seni kehidupan yang baru. Penuh dengan kebahagian yang diredhai Allah, penuh dengan kejayaan, penuh dengan cinta dan kehidupan. I am going to be sweet Muslimah like I am before and even better ! Sekarang ni I am 21, upcoming 23 I am going to get married ( with somebody that I dont even know, am hoping for the best from Allah) !

 (A picture of me shows that I am happy !)

I am writing this in Ramadhan. Hari pertama dalam 10 malam terakhir. Jom kejar Lailatulqadr ! Yeahh! I want it! I want to be SOMEBODY <3 ^^